When dealing with an adult diaper, attitude is everything.

The subject of incontinence and adult diapers can hush conversation in a crowded room like few other topics. And, there are powerful emotions behind that momentary silence that few want to explore. Simply put, no one wants to wear adult diapers.

Certainly, few people realize that nearly 25 million adult Americans experience incontinence at one level or another. That is a lot of people using adult diapers or some other type of incontinence protection. Yet, most people who are incontinent feel embarrassed and alone.

Attitude and emotional response to having to wear adult diapers has a big impact on how the wearer and caregivers adjust to the situation. So examining your response and working toward a healthier response can be very helpful.

There are three main responses to having to wear adult diapers:

1. disbelief and discomfort 2. becoming overly humorous 3. a healthy & accepting attitude.

1) With the first response most of the people wearing adult diapers get depressed at their new situation. They are embarrassed and uncomfortable and would rather stay home than go out and live their previously active lives. In these cases it is necessary to help the wearer work through their feelings so they feel comfortable living their live as fully as they are capable of, just while wearing adult diapers. It helps to make them realize that no one is noticing that they have on adult diapers.

Ask them to think about whether or not they have ever noticed someone on the street wearing incontinence products and they will probably say no or very rarely.  The reality is no one is paying enough attention to notice. If after a few weeks or months the wearer is till having difficulty coming to terms with their having to use adult diapers you should speak to their doctor about getting some professional counseling to help them come to terms with being incontinent.

2) Another common response to having to wear adult diapers is often humor. Humor is a positive response to incontinence. Laughter has its place and healing qualities when stacked against attitudes of depression and disbelief and it can certainly help you get through the messy parts of the day.

3) The third response is also very healthy. It combines humor and laughter with an ability to face the sometimes gritty and messy realities of wearing adult diapers. No one wants to wear adult diapers but most of us get to the point where the healthiest thing we can do is accept the reality of the situation when it is time.


One woman told of how she wished her mother could have just relaxed a little more about her physical situation and given in to wearing the adult diapers her body needed. Instead, she sadly dehydrated herself into oblivion at a time when her other faculties were still sharp.

One caregiver talked of the dignity a good fitting pair of adult diapers gave her patient because he no longer feared the embarrassment of soiled linens and upholstery as he carried on with his life at home. Another was a personal tale of peacefully falling asleep at night no longer having to set the alarm for an unholy hour in the hope of getting to the bathroom in time to avoid a bed wetting. When looked at in a healthy way, using adult diapers with an accepting attitude can often help the incontinent experience a mild form of liberation in an unexpected way.


Really, no one is ever eager to join that 25 million strong group of incontinence sufferers. But, when it becomes time, “Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” (Winston Churchill).